How...

How could I have been so foolish? How could I think I could have what was not mine to have?
I saw the signs, I see the signs. I have seen the signs since the beginning. And I made the glorious mistake of disregarding what my seventeen years of observation, study, criticism and wisdom has taught me.
Why did I stay alive? Why will she not be better for me? Why is our relationship not worth her time of day? I have tried, desperately, to make it work. But I cannot puppeteer free will, nor will I attempt to mold it.
I will do what I can, and go all-in, if she is willing to dedicate more than the tiniest percentage of her heart into it. Sadly, her heart is spoken for. Action speaks more than words, and the words are self-contradictory.
It seems I have wasted my last remaining spark of life on igniting the cold, dark remnants of my heart for this... Doomed love.